sorry about everything...  i'm just bitchy today and sad but, its not like anyone cares anyways so heres a song! 

Unwritten Law- Save Me

Had a bad day, don't talk to me,
gonna ride this out,
My little black heart, breaks apart,
with your big mouth.

And I'm sick of my sickness
Don't touch me, you'll get this.
I'm useless, lazy, perverted,
and you hate me.

You can't save me,
You can't change me,
Well I'm waiting for my wake up call,
And everything, everything's my fault.

Went to the doctor, and I asked her,
to make this stop.
Got medication, a new addiction,
Fucken thanks a lot.

Had to relapse, I'm outta rehab,
It ruined everything.
So point your finger, at the singer,
He's in the pharmacy.

You can't save me,
You can't change me,
Well I'm waiting for my wake up call ,
and everything's my fault.

You can't save me,
You can't blame me,
Well I'm waiting here to take a fall,
and everything, and everthing's my fault.

And I'm a death threat haven't slept yet,

Baby wide awake at dawn.
Helmet bad boy, tell the tabloids,
everything's my fault.

I went to heaven, couldn't get in,
For what I had done.
I said forsake me, you said you're crazy
you were too much fun.

You can't save me,
You can't change me,
Well I'm waiting for my wake up call ,
and everything's my fault.

You can't save me,
You can't blame me,
Well I'm waiting here to take a fall,
and everything,everthing's my fault.

You can't save me,
You can't change me,
You can't save me,
You can't change me,
You can't save me,
You can't change me,(everthing's my fault)
You can't save me,
You can't change me,

Everything's my fault.

Shinedown- Burning Bright

I feel like there is no need for conversation
Some questions are better left without a reason
And I would rather reveal myself than my situation
Now and then I consider, my hesitation
The more the light shines through me
I pretend to close my eyes
The more the dark consumes me
I pretend I'm burning, burning bright

I wonder if the things I did were just to be different
To spare myself of the constant shame of my existence
And I would surely redeem myself in my desperation
Here and now I'll express, my situation

There's nothing ever wrong but nothing's ever right
Such a cruel contradiction
I know I cross the lines its not easy to define
I'm born to indecision
There's always something new some path I'm supposed to choose
With no particular rhyme or reason

I'm sorry  

hello everybody!  rawr!!!  Its been a really boring day.  I try to be mad at him but I can't do it.  Thats the one thing that drives me nuts about him.  Grrr... He was supposed to be home when I got home from school so he could come over but instead he had to go to Wilton with his friend or something.  So, the only thing I have to be bad about is the fact that he didn't call to let me know we weren't going to be able to hang out.  It sucks.  I hate staying home and because he had to be a pain in the ass I have to sit here all night and watch my sister.  She's being really cute though!  She was like sis I want to go to bed.  So I got her pajamas on and she asked me if I would watch TV with her in my moms room.  I said yes so I brought her in there and she wanted her damn pillows so I went to get them for her and she made me put them under her head and tuck her in!  Then, she fell asleep like 10 minutes after that.  She's such a good baby!  Mike is watching Street Fighting 2 or whatever that movie is called!  lmao!  He imed me to tell me that he watched the best movie so I asked him which one it was and that was his reply was Street Fighting.  O boy... what have I got myself into.  I used to have to watch stupid space movies with the old Mike and now I have to watch this crap with the new Mike.  Someone save me!!  Everyone is at the dance right now.  I miss people and you have only been gone for like 2 hours.  I'm so lonely!  lol!  Tomorrow Sarah is coming over and we are going bowling with Chris and George and Sarah.  I'm going to be the 5th wheel.  Mike is leaving for Georgia at like 4 am on Sunday morning.  Its going to suck so bad.  I hope he has fun but i'm going to kind of miss him.  I shouldn't but its hard not to.  He is addicting!  rawr!!!  Shawna, I know you are right about what is happening.  Its going to suck but I can't help it.  Its one of those things that you can't help.  i love ya though!  call me when you get home from the dance... no one is home so it doesn't matter what time!  Thats all for now!!  I have to go talk to my little asshole! 

<33 Janelle

rawr!!  today was somewhat interesting.  I had my lovely Dr appointment.  That sucked as usual.  I was glad that he didn't make any odd comments like Kneesaas!  lol.  I came home and called Rosemary because obviously someone has been running their mouths way too much.  I never said anything about kicking anyones ass and neither did Shawna.  The big bird thing was not me.  I am not the type of person to say something like that because it is mean and I would never say something that would hurt someones feelings like that.  The only things I ever said is that Shawna didn't say 3/4 the stuff that was said.  I said that I think its stupid that I was being called names when there is no reason for them but I never cared about being called names.  I now know that the names weren't said towards me in a bad way.  So let the drama end! 

other than that my day has been pretty boring.  Mike came to school to get Shawna with Jake but I don't know why because she had to stay after or something.  So they wasted a trip out here.  It made me happy to see him at the end of the day!  Especially when I wasn't expecting to see him until later on.  My mom wouldn't let me go see him so I'm sad.  Hopefully I can hang out with him tomorrow.  He's going to Georgia for a week.  I'm going to be so lonely.  I'm not going to be able to smile for a week.  thats going to suck!!!! 

Shawna... Good luck with whatever you are trying to do!  I'm staying out of it from now on.  Its your life and you have to do what you want.  I just don't want to see you get hurt anymore.  You are one of my best friends... I love you to pieces!!  Don't let what people say to you bother you because they don't know what they are talking about!  Call me later. 

Thats all I'm writing for now.  byebyes

<33  Janelle

I went to mikes house and met his parents!  They seem really nice!  OMFG…. He told his mom that I like Aaron.  I could have killed him.  Then, we went to the mall!  I know where the broomball thing goes on now... its outside.  I thought it was an indoor thing.  Anyways... we went to the mall.  Jake bought 2 new hats!  I like them!  Lol!  I picked one and mike picked the other!  Shawna will like them on him!  They make him look cute!  Lmao!  I was sadly the third wheel the entire day.  It made me wonder.  It was like Mike and Jake were dating!  Lol!  Its kind of odd but they keep bringing up Prom.  You would almost think they want to go with Shawna and I!!  I’m waiting to get to know Mike a little better before I ask him if he’ll go with me.  Things are going pretty damn slow between us.  That’s a good thing though.  Tomorrow they are picking us up from school, at our locker, and Jake is NEVER late!  Lmao!  Watch, they will be there at like 3:00 or something!  We shall see how he acts when there are two other people around!  I guess I’m going to read the rest of Huck Finn.  Omg… yesterday when Mike Zugar was here we burned like 10 cds and the last one was for me so after I put the blank in we stupidly waited for it to get done before Mike left and at the end he was like I could have left a long time ago because his cd wasn’t being used anymore lol so he picked up the cd off the top of his big spool of blank cds and leaves.  Neither one of us realized until this morning that he forgot the cds!  It was our bright moment!  Lol!  Ok… now I’m going!  Byebyes  

<33  Janelle